Cheese Rule

Mr. Gin and Tonic:

Whereas, I like cheese; and

Admitting that I do get awfully hungry at times.

Recognizing that my outrageous hunger can lead to an urgent need to get cheese into my mouth; and

Discovering that the kitchen can be dark.

Further noting, for the record, that cheese can go bad;

Now, therefore, I hereby resolve, by unanimous vote, the following:

I) At all times practicable, I shall always, without fail, make a thorough examination of cheese prior to placing said cheese in my mouth.

II) Extra particular attention shall at all times be paid to cheese, which has been stored in a non-original container, or which has been otherwise unsealed and exposed to the elements.

III) At no time shall cheese of any sort be eaten in the dark.

IV) To the extent possible, dependant upon the limitations of available olfactory senses, each and every cheese shall be smelled prior to consumption, without exception.

Enacted, this day of June, 2008.