Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Cheese Rule

Mr. Gin and Tonic:

Whereas, I like cheese; and

Admitting that I do get awfully hungry at times.

Recognizing that my outrageous hunger can lead to an urgent need to get cheese into my mouth; and

Discovering that the kitchen can be dark.

Further noting, for the record, that cheese can go bad;

Now, therefore, I hereby resolve, by unanimous vote, the following:

I) At all times practicable, I shall always, without fail, make a thorough examination of cheese prior to placing said cheese in my mouth.

II) Extra particular attention shall at all times be paid to cheese, which has been stored in a non-original container, or which has been otherwise unsealed and exposed to the elements.

III) At no time shall cheese of any sort be eaten in the dark.

IV) To the extent possible, dependant upon the limitations of available olfactory senses, each and every cheese shall be smelled prior to consumption, without exception.

Enacted, this day of June, 2008.

8 comments:

  1. Gay Brian6:54 AM

    I have the same rules for cock.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Your rules should mention something about the type of cheese and whether or not mold removal is planned. We have to conserve as much as possible with the rising price of food.

    ReplyDelete
  3. captain fantastic11:32 AM

    Slow day in comment world. I guess everyone thinks that it serves you right for eating bad cheese.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous1:17 PM

    Or maybe it was just a boring blog.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I would simply point out that those rules could apply to a great many things...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Like what Mitch? I just can't think of anything else...

    ReplyDelete
  7. I agree with gay Brian

    There are things that you should thoroughly examine and smell before you put them in your mouth, even maybe licking and nibling them first before taking in the whole thing

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous4:45 PM

    That's funny, I always thought gay Brian and Lisa were the same person. Interesting

    ReplyDelete

Be compelling.

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