Saturday, February 25, 2006

I Changed My Mind

I was wrong.

Everything that I said about Intelligent Design being cherry-flavored crack for Jesus junkies was wrong. Those comments that I made about it being faerie-tale fundamentalist bilgewater were misguided. That bit that I wrote suggesting that tribal girls from Guinea sitting in a mud-hut classroom were laughing at the slack-brained yokalism running rampant through the halls of American academia, was out of line.

I have been born again. I can see the light.

Life here, and throughout all of Creation, is simply too complex to be understood through secular godless scientific skullduggery. It is plain to me that the miracle of life was formed by HIS loving Noodly Appendage. All alternative theories of Man's origins must be taught in public schools.


Praise him. Praise the Flying spaghetti Monster, in his glory.

Thanks to George for showing me the true path.


9 comments:

  1. Was this covered in the Roberts opinion?

    The WWW page does not seem to go into where Sarraffian fits in to his great scheme. That will be the final test of truth.

    When is the comet due?

    Save the pirates.

    I believe.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Make sure to post when your T-shirt comes in!

    Macaroni will save us all!!!

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  3. For the record, my 8 year old asked what "WWFSMD?" meant.

    I told her.

    Her response:
    "Maybe look for a wife."

    So it is official. God is lonely.

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  4. Brian! I can't believe you would suggest that this type of pastaism would be taught in schools! Isn't that CarboLoading!

    A friend of mine had shown me this, too...this guy is nuts and brilliant! And an Oregonian!

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  5. All the briliant nuts seem to live in Oregon.

    It was asked on myspace whether I can perform marriages in the name of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. As an ordained minister in the Universal Life Church, I can marry anyone in the name of any deity, or no deity at all. So, the answer is yes, I can perform a Pastafarian wedding ceremony. Praise to the Noodly One.

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  6. Spanky (not really Spanky)8:38 PM

    This brings up an extremly interesting thought...

    If someone (not me) were to clone either his or her wife or girlfriend, and then proceed to marry the original and the clone, would that be considered polygamy?

    Second, what is the general consensus regarding speedo use in the holy sanctum? If good, can I then (and yet again, I does not refer to me) put a potato down my pants?

    Thank you for your support.

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  7. Speghetti-O's..the new eucharist?

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  8. ...In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Manicotti

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Be compelling.

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