Thursday, February 16, 2006

As Seen On Oprah

It's the blog topic that won't die.

In passing, I suggested that I might install a stripper pole on my desk. That was nearly two weeks ago, and pie-holes are still postulating about the who, and the where, and the why, and the how. What kind of pole will I get? How will it fit in my office? Who do I expect to dance on it? Where will I move my in-box? Who will I get to DJ? Have I considered a disco ball? Will there be enough head clearance if the dancer is in heels? When are try-outs?

It was just a joke. Or at least, it started off as a joke. The more I look into it, however, the more I see it becoming a possibility, even a potentiality. That is why I have gone and drawn up technical schematics for the desk-top installation.

The pole itself is readily available at many on-line outlets such as ("As seen on Oprah") The only problem will be pole length, but I'm sure no one will mind when I punch through the false acoustic ceiling to secure the pole to a support joist. Dancers may have to duck a little.

I suppose anyone can audition, but there will be a $50 desk-stage fee. I will DJ myself using my Sirius feed. Tipping will be encouraged, as dancers will work for tips and tips alone.


  1. make sure you get the one that spins.

  2. absolutely. blisters aren't sexy.

  3. Actually, if you're gonna do it, you might as well talk to the adult store across the street from your office about sharing expenses for the installation. I mean, one entire wall of your office is a window that looks out over a busy road. The store would benefit b/c any passersby would get a free show on the way to the porn shop. More customers for them. I dunno, the details are fuzzy, but I think there's a business deal to be made there.

    So are you gonna have fetish night? I bet preggos might be able to make some good money.

  4. First - Let me say - a window show (very popular in Europe) might help offset your "costs" (insurance, a wet bar installation in the office, handi-wipes). Second - I know this will be a shock to you, but FAR less people are intrigued/aroused by pregnant women than you think. Believe me... Give it a rest.

  5. there is a club here in town that features "Big Girl" night, but that isn't the same as "Really Big Girl" night.

    On the other hand, I seem to recall a night with Mitch at a little place called Flight 99 in Salem. Drug deals... cross dressers, and a pregnant dancer on the stage. So, maybe Leah has a point.

  6. Brian... let's start with the obvious qualifier in your post - "one night in SALEM..."

  7. All I remember from that night was a little drive we took to Brooks...

  8. Was that the night the dancer passed out on stage at the old Flight 99 and fell over the rail?

    Good times that.

    Thought come to think of it, "the night the dancer passed out on stage" in reference to Flight 99 is not much of a qualifier.

  9. choose an identity7:55 AM

    Is the drawing to scale?

  10. only the booze drawer is drawn to scale


Be compelling.

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