It's a very large glass, and most likely a very small girl. There is a lot of ice, making me wonder how much liquid was actually there (in oz. or ml.). Also, you can bet she bullshits on the alcohol wherever she works. The management probably has a "no free pours" rule.
Brian -- we do not like this intermittent reinforcement you have going on with the smut here. Me thinks you are becoming much too gentleman-like since working on Martha's campaign.
Looking at this again, I'd also like to point out what a crappy bartender this woman is. A good bartender wouldn't put the lime in last where it would simply float on top of the rest of the drink. Even a competent bartender would know to squeeze the lime in while adding the tonic so that everything is pleasantly combined.
As for the lack of smut here, that woman could wet her ridiculous balloon of a blouse and you still woudn't be able to see anything titillating.
My personal lime application method calls for a wedge squeeze after the...
Well, wait, let me back up.
First, get out a glass. A tall glass. Fill about 2/3 with ice.
Next, add gin, about a third of the glass. Now, a little note on gin, when mixing, expensive gin or quality gin is not necessary. Inog's precious Boodles, for instance, shouldn't be maimed by tonic.
On the other hand HRD gin, in the plastic bottle, has a faint odor of window cleaner, so avoid the really cheap stuff. A mid-line Bombay ot Tanqueray will do just fine.
THEN, as Fred points out, sqeeze a wedge of lime over the chilling gin. If you have it, add a drop or two of arromatic bitters. (A little goes a long way.) Then, top the glass off with fresh Tonic. By pouring over the top of the lime, the flavors are swirled throughout the glass.
If your tonic has been in the fridge too long, toss it, and pull a fresh bottle form the pantry. Nothing is sadder than a G&T with limp fizz.
Last, garnish with an additioanl lime wedge on top for presentation...
That sounds fantastic, Brian... the smut and the G&T recipe. Now all I have to do is develop a taste for gin. I'll have to try the technique with some Ketel One vodka. :)
Ok, so he could combine it with what he wants to do with the camera.
Have a naked girl making the G&T to the music. Then she gives him the drink while he sits and relaxes. Finally she does the lap dance as he's sipping his G&T
Dr. Brian, think of it in these terms: Half-assed masturbation to get yourself to sleep, the aching potential of a morning erection. One has promise, and one is just rather haggard.
Maybe the bartender was pregnant, and didn't want her boss to know, because she really needs the money and the job. Her boyfriend has been out of work for a few months now--he works construction and it's the off season.
She's also worried her boyfriend is shagging her best friend while she's out bartending. Her rent is overdue and the landlord has offered her payment in kind and shes figuring out if she should let him bang her from behind so she doesn't have to look at his pervy ugly face
Thats why while all the other bartenders vying for bartender of the month did fancy Sex on the Beach cocktails and she could only think of a crummy G&T
They forgot the bitters.
ReplyDeleteIt's a very large glass, and most likely a very small girl. There is a lot of ice, making me wonder how much liquid was actually there (in oz. or ml.). Also, you can bet she bullshits on the alcohol wherever she works. The management probably has a "no free pours" rule.
ReplyDeleteAnd Beefeaters blows.
I was expecting her to turn the soda squirter onto herself and her top to become see through
ReplyDeleteSorry Brian, I misjudged you..
I'm with Lisa here. Really expected more.
ReplyDeleteThis wasn't so much the "Best G&T video" I could find. Rather it was just the least-crappy of the bunch.
ReplyDeleteSome folks were using lemon. Some were using a single ounces of gin. One even added pommegranite juice!
Fred is right about the bitters, but good luck finding that on youtube...
Brian -- we do not like this intermittent reinforcement you have going on with the smut here. Me thinks you are becoming much too gentleman-like since working on Martha's campaign.
ReplyDeleteAllie, thank you for your concern.
ReplyDeleteObviously, last night's G&T video post was what Fred and Abestis frequently call "filler." Sadly, this week is destined to be chockfull of filler.
Tonight, I will play host to a special out-of-town guest, and tomorrow night, we leave for Idaho to see the in-laws.
Chances are, I might be able to post something from the Woodriver Valley, but if I do, It will be brief and filler-like.
Once I return, however, it will be smut-galore! You have my word.
Looking at this again, I'd also like to point out what a crappy bartender this woman is. A good bartender wouldn't put the lime in last where it would simply float on top of the rest of the drink. Even a competent bartender would know to squeeze the lime in while adding the tonic so that everything is pleasantly combined.
ReplyDeleteAs for the lack of smut here, that woman could wet her ridiculous balloon of a blouse and you still woudn't be able to see anything titillating.
My personal lime application method calls for a wedge squeeze after the...
ReplyDeleteWell, wait, let me back up.
First, get out a glass. A tall glass. Fill about 2/3 with ice.
Next, add gin, about a third of the glass. Now, a little note on gin, when mixing, expensive gin or quality gin is not necessary. Inog's precious Boodles, for instance, shouldn't be maimed by tonic.
On the other hand HRD gin, in the plastic bottle, has a faint odor of window cleaner, so avoid the really cheap stuff. A mid-line Bombay ot Tanqueray will do just fine.
THEN, as Fred points out, sqeeze a wedge of lime over the chilling gin. If you have it, add a drop or two of arromatic bitters. (A little goes a long way.) Then, top the glass off with fresh Tonic. By pouring over the top of the lime, the flavors are swirled throughout the glass.
If your tonic has been in the fridge too long, toss it, and pull a fresh bottle form the pantry. Nothing is sadder than a G&T with limp fizz.
Last, garnish with an additioanl lime wedge on top for presentation...
You should make a video..
ReplyDeleteThat sounds fantastic, Brian... the smut and the G&T recipe. Now all I have to do is develop a taste for gin. I'll have to try the technique with some Ketel One vodka. :)
ReplyDeleteSince I keep my gin in the freezer, I skimp on the ice so there is more room for the delicious alcoholic beverage.
ReplyDeleteLisa, Brian has a new digital video camera so he certainly could. But, you know he has other plans for that camera.
[cue music]
ReplyDeleteOk, so he could combine it with what he wants to do with the camera.
ReplyDeleteHave a naked girl making the G&T to the music. Then she gives him the drink while he sits and relaxes. Finally she does the lap dance as he's sipping his G&T
"smut-galore! You have my word"
ReplyDeleteLawyers and their promises.
In the meantime, the Boodles is chilling.
Hey, anyone want to play strip battleship at the G & T fete? Really, just me? Isn't it always the way...
ReplyDeleteYou'll have to check in with Ryan, the entertainment director, but I could see a strip battleship tournament in the plans...
ReplyDeleteI'll dust off the elephant speedos!!
ReplyDeleteWhy are your comments much better then the blog itself? Do you think better in the morning all amped on coffee?
Dr. Brian, think of it in these terms:
ReplyDeleteHalf-assed masturbation to get yourself to sleep, the aching potential of a morning erection. One has promise, and one is just rather haggard.
Hmmm... So many thoughts:
ReplyDelete1. Yes, the bartender should be topless, or, at the least, skimpy attire which she wets down with the soda gun.
2. Beefeater? At a minimum, Bombay, I'd think.
3. Vodka and Tonic is nice - though, I prefer Vodka and Soda. Not quite as sweet.
4. Scotch is so much easier. No mixing.
Now...where are my matches... I have a cohiba to get to....
I finished off the Bunnahabain last night. I could have gone for a cigar to wash it down...
ReplyDeleteMaybe the bartender was pregnant, and didn't want her boss to know, because she really needs the money and the job. Her boyfriend has been out of work for a few months now--he works construction and it's the off season.
ReplyDeleteShe's also worried her boyfriend is shagging her best friend while she's out bartending. Her rent is overdue and the landlord has offered her payment in kind and shes figuring out if she should let him bang her from behind so she doesn't have to look at his pervy ugly face
ReplyDeleteThats why while all the other bartenders vying for bartender of the month did fancy Sex on the Beach cocktails and she could only think of a crummy G&T
girl gots orange skin.
ReplyDeleteaching potential...describes your attempt at the paper towel roll.
ReplyDeleteAbout the sleep issues, try using your left hand...feels like someone else is doing it.
Sorry Amanda and Lisa, I had to change my name to B.S. on myspace.
Too many pervy lets play doctor and nurses' mails?
ReplyDeleteThe comments are WAY better than the post.
ReplyDelete