Ho Mok Ta Lay

Sausage and mushroom pizza?
New York steak, medium rare?
Oysters on the half shell?
Homemade vanilla bean ice cream, with caramel and whipped cream?

What would you choose, should you find yourself ordering out for the last time.

Say, for instance, you were in Texas, and were found driving an Econoline van filled full with dead high school cheerleaders. Then, as your day of reckoning came, as eternity drew near, and you were offered a final meal, what would you choose? Would you gluttonously gorge on every choco-bunnie and swizzle stick you could lay your sin-stenched fingers upon?

Would you meditate on a meal menu to remind you of your favorite flavors?

Would you carefully craft your meal for posterity, making a statement, vague and arcane as it may be, for future generations to ponder? (e.g. Ted Bundy ordered fried chicken, fried shrimp, french fries, and fresh strawberries. Then, he refused the meal when it came. How very peculiar...)

Would you use your order simply to screw with the guards one last time?

During many a long dark drive home, under the dreary drizzle of the Oregon winter, I asked myself this question. For a long while, I thought the answer was simply the peppery tart gelatinous General Tso's Chicken, as made only at August Moon in Portland. Maybe a side of the hot and sour soup, if I felt up to it.

Then, however, over time, I made the move to Massaman Curry with beef. It's like mom's homemade beef stew, that is if mom came from Surat Thani or Phitsanulok...

But now, however, I have made a new choice. No one felt like cooking tonight, and the monkey wanted to get out of the house. So, we packed up and rolled to the nearby Thai place.

Bored, I was, with my usual selections. So, I branched out and scanned the seafood selections on the right edge of the menu. A little something called Ho Mok Ta Lay caught my eye. Calamari, clams, scallops, mushrooms, onions, curry and sweet basil. Sweet Jesus! It was beauty in a bowl. It was almost proof that there was a god, and he was Thai...

So that's it, I can now go gracefully to the gallows, knowing confidently, that before I go, I get to eat some of that.

Oh, and, I'll order from Bangkok, just to screw with the guards.