Monday, November 27, 2006

Late Shift

Trisha was working the late shift at Target. Clad as she was in tan pants and red short-sleeved blouse, she looked down the deserted aisles, looking for signs on life, or a patron to process through the checkstand maze.

She was crabby. She wasn't supposed to work tonight, but Cheryl couldn't make it in due to snow. So, Trisha had to cover.

So, there she stood, in sensible shoes, regretting the fast food she feasted on for dinner. Bored. Cold. Dreaming of a day when she would work regular hours with regular weekends. Maybe she would be a dental assistant. Maybe she would be a paralegal (whatever that is...) The odor of the over-buttered popcorn wafted from the food court.

She felt ill.

Suddenly she saw him. Perhaps the last customer of the night on this snowy November Monday. He was tall. Over 6 foot for sure. He wore a ratty green sweatshirt under a black leather coat. He had bad hair. His glasses were too big for his face. He smelled vaguely of gin.

In one hand, he carried discs; CDs and DVDs. Among them, INXS, Gorillaz, and the Little Mermaid. In the other hand he held a six pack of one-liter bottles of 7-Up.

For this, he left the house late and braved the snow? This was the late night shopping emergency? Sad really. She smiled politely.

He fumbled with his debit card, seemingly confused by basic technology. He mumbled something both unfunny and incoherent.

Trisha kindly packed the bags, gave the man his receipt, and sent him on his way. To his credit, he shuffled out the door without complication.

Trisha, knowing the end of the shift was near, slumped against her register and sighed.


  1. Mrs G & T having "morning" sickness, huh? Bummer.

  2. Sounds like you purchased a CD that was released this century. Good for you!

  3. At least this time, you had something on UNDER the leather trenchcoat!!!


  4. Decidedly bad hair, eh?

    Target employees are tortured enough, man! What is the matter with you?!

  5. Oh so much, Allie. Oh so much.

  6. I think you guys have it all wrong. Brian changed his name, got a sex change operation, quit his law practice, and now works the lonely shift at Target.

  7. Did you do her in the butt?

  8. I have known you for a long time - it would have been more shocking if you had good hair and not been wearing a ratty sweatshirt.

  9. You mean didnt break into an impromptu lounge version of "some enchanted evening"? Dude, you are slipping.

    I thought the exact same thing Carl.

  10. I was hoping the story would turn into some axe murder horror flick.

  11. trisha from target10:21 AM

    I thought my life was pathetic until that lawyer guy came in. I mean look at that hair.

  12. Yes, I did her in the butt behind the buttered popcorn machine.

  13. Trisha from Target1:56 PM

    He thought he was doing me in the butt. He was actually doing the buttered popcorn machine


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