Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Have it Your Way

What in the name of the Whopper is Burger King thinking? Who the fuck is the marketing genius that came up with this train wreck? Have you seen it? The big creepy plastic-headed dead-eyed semi-psychotic fast-food icon, hiding in people's closets, sleeping in their beds, following folks to work...

I mean, what's the strategy there? "OK Mr. Consumer, our food haunts your every waking hour, like a high-cholesterol zombie. You cannot escape! Surrender now to to the dark overlord of charbroiled beef patties!"

Not like I go to Burger King very often as it is, but now I have to boycott the place just on principle. I refuse to reward ill-advised advertising.

12 comments:

  1. Is this a leftover from those crappy nativity scenes.I think this guy brought mirr and his other king mates brought ketchup and heart attacks.

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  2. Whopper, ketchup mustard only. It is really quite fine.

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  3. Anonymous12:35 PM

    Amen! I especially can't get over the one where the guy wakes up to find that "king" in his bed. Can you say Godfather? I would totally freak out if I woke up to a sight like that! And that's supposed to make me WANT their product??

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  4. Anonymous1:46 PM

    He scares the hell out of me. If I ever see the king (and I don't mean Elvis), I'm cracking his head open like a pinata. If onion rings fall out, I might feel better about him.

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  5. Anonymous3:17 PM

    I wait for the day the King pulls out a butcher knife in a commercial. That's a scary image, think about it.

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  6. Anonymous4:54 PM

    I think there should be a horror movie series made with the King as the crazed murderer. And, in part four, he and Bob's Big Boy can duke it out.

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  7. 2 things:

    1. at least it's not as bad as the commerical with the giant whopper that falls from the sky, and that guy starts mouthing it - fucking gross.

    2. Quiznos had way worse campaigns; Raised by Wolves, singing furry balls of meat, "WE LOVE THEE SUBS!"

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  8. Anonymous11:02 AM

    The football comercial makes him look like he flys a mini hovercraft instead of running .So thats whats under his robe.

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  9. Anonymous11:32 AM

    OH MY GOD, do NOT remind of those god-awful Quiznos commercials! I thought I'd banished them from my memory for good! Never has a commercial turned me OFF to a product so much. I still get queasy everytime I pass by a Quiznos-- and I've never even eaten there before!

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  10. Anonymous8:06 AM

    ok I've got to come to America just to watch your stupid commercials

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  11. Anonymous11:47 PM

    I wonder what the Queen looks like?

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  12. Yeah, totally true. This "thing" scares the shit out of me. He ranks right up there with clowns. The one where he runs down the football field and jumps into the crowd? Nightmarish. The one where the guy wakes up and he is staring at him a cat's face distance away? Beyond comprehension.

    What's the number for a good local therapist? I have some memories I would like to repress.

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Be compelling.

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