Monday, August 27, 2007

Finger Watch 2007!!

It's coming off.

Slowly now, but persistently, the nail of my right index finger is peeling away from its nail bed.

As the tip of my finger was held tight in the tiny crevice between my car doors, while I fished around in my pocket with my free hand for my keys to unlock the door, and while I struggled to maintain my composure, I thought to myself: "Well, I'm gonna lose that nail..."

I was sure of it. For the three days of cartoon-like swelling, and for the week and a half of the sub-nail squishy-floaty sensation, I was certain that I would lose it.

In the last week, though, as it descended into its current dark purplish hue, the nail seemed to solidify within its cuticle bounds. I began to allow myself the hope that it might remain miraculously intact.

Alas. It's coming off. By tomorrow afternoon, I expect to look something like Jeff Goldblum in The Fly.

Buzz...

6 comments:

  1. Pictures please.

    I want 20 stills, frame by frame as your remove this part of yourself.

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  2. Ow! Hope you heal quickly!

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  3. Anonymous9:10 AM

    I can't help but notice that you haven't posted anything about the BBQ challenge. Lost huh? Loser.

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  4. The BBQ contest went exactly as I predicted. I came in 4th but the winner actually won with the recipe that I gave him.

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  5. Dammit, why do I always have to click on gross blogs right as I'm about to eat?

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  6. Do you love because the judge found a Jeff Goldbloom like body part in your BBQ? The "Human flesh really adds to the flavor" bit didn't work with the judges, huh?

    ReplyDelete

Be compelling.

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