Friday, November 16, 2007

Bees

It's a fact, the bees are dying.

Millions of them are dying each day. Entire hives. Entire subspecies are swarming to extinction each and every day. Science has done little to quell the catastrophe. Religion has done even less.

Forget global warming. Forget peak oil. Forget the rising tide of Islamic nationalism, killer asteroids or even the bird flu.

No, life as we know it will end, because of the bees.

They are responsible for 65% of all petroleum products on the market today. Bee secretions and hormones are harvested to manufacture nearly all of today's antibiotics and honey has been proven to contain natural derivatives that cure cancer, HIV and male pattern baldness.

Also, bees are necessary for the pollination of every single crop in the world. Science is entirely unable to duplicate what bees do. Without bees, there will be absolutely no food.

Worst of all, without bees, there will be no wax, and without wax, there will be none of this:



Looks like fun huh? I bet you'd like to learn the mystical art of the bikini wax to impress you family and neighbors. Well, here's an extra special bonus, because, well, I'm good like that.

Have fun kids, wax safely:

6 comments:

  1. I have had bee soup.

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  2. One comment? Seriously??

    You people suck.

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  3. And the only loser that did comment, once again just commented about how the blog relates to him. What a self centered fuck.

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  4. Yes, seriously. Did you really think you would stir things up with a post that most (if not all) of your female readers wouldn't even read due to the cringe factor? And, I've found that men don't want to know how that bikini line gets smooth and lickable.

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  5. You are wrong there Fred. I always like to know.

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  6. There is always an exception to the rule. Thank you, Dr. Brian.

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Be compelling.

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