Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Reasonably Calculated to Lead to the Discovery of Admissible Evidence

Fortunately (or unfortunately) my depositions don't go like this, although sometimes, I do make the girls cry...

Free legal advice: if you are ever giving testimony under oath, particularly in front of a camera, try not to look like a jackass...

Of course, I did almost see something like this one up in Seattle one day. There was lots of swearing and an old fat guy shook and empty water glass at a lawyer twice his size:


  1. Once they say "fuck you" I consider all subsequent testimony part of the "bonus round."

  2. Brian, you just made me feel even worse about my job. I never get to fight with clients...just hurt them. I just pulled out an upper molar with an oozing abcess that smelled like dead ass.

    Anyone for mac and cheese?

  3. Im not allowed to hit my patients back, unless it's in something stupid like 4 seconds, then it counts as reflex self defence - no fun at all

  4. I've never been in a deposition where all the lawyers started brawling. I loved the deponant making a move at the questioning attorney.

  5. Anonymous1:18 PM

    deponant? You people make up words. Do lawyers really need their own version of English?

  6. Anonymous1:51 PM

    Actually, most of it's based on Latin. And yes, we do. Keeps you little people in line. And paying us to translate for you.

  7. . . . most of it's based on Latin.

    In case you hadn't noticed, you could say the same for English (along with healthy doses of other languages, yes, but many that also have their roots in Latin). But, that doesn't mean lawyers speak English. Reading a contract is a dead giveaway that law school teaches lawyers how to butcher their native languages.

  8. God, lawyers are pompous asses sometimes

    Law doesn't have the monopoly on using latin derived long words to sound important

    habetis bona deum

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  12. Anonymous2:45 PM

    "Law doesn't have the monopoly on using latin derived long words to sound important"

    Said the nurse....

  13. I think that was my point..


Be compelling.

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