Children...
Cocaine...
The souls of dancing girls...
Absent a bargain-basement Bogota clearance sale, attended by one shrewd marketing Mephistopheles, how can Shakira be explained? One third-world Latina with a velvety voice should not, could not, have conquered so much of the known musical world without direct diabolical demonic intervention.Yes, the rhythmic swaying and swooshing of her smooth tanned hips hypnotizes with hedonistic allure. Yes, I want to touch her. That is beside the point.
OK, so she is ridiculously sexy. Yes, she creates more swampy steam than the entire Amazonian rain forest. That does not mean that she deserves an intercontinental portion of pop supplication.She can't really sing THAT well, and when she does sing, it is awkward and stinted, or at least it is when she sings in English, which I guess is her second language, but hey, I'm not trying to hawk my wares south of the Rio Grande either.
So, what is the story? Quit Claim Deed of the soul to the dark lord of the underworld? Sure. But like Kiely Minogue, I have to wonder, who's she blowing? Certainly no one gets this much forced top-40 propaganda without a little (or a lot of) fellatio on the side.I suppose she has talent. The dancing is delectable. The voice, if it's hers, is sultry. However, I suspect the real talent lies in her god-given ability to suck the chrome off a trailer hitch.
Viva La Bimbo!! Ole!
she's blowing gay jesus. There's no doubt in my mind.
ReplyDeleteWell, congratulations to you, then...
ReplyDeleteWho is gay jesus?
ReplyDeleteGo check out Margus' blog for the answers you seek.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to have to read some other blog. I try to remain blog monogomous.
ReplyDeletesay "Blog monogomus" 10 times, fast
ReplyDeleteWe all have our people to blow in some form or another.
ReplyDeleteyes, but blowing Tom won't get you anywhere...
ReplyDeleteShakira is a follower of a very mystical form of Catholicism. She also has a hand in writing the music and lyrics in all of her songs. While I agree that her English songs are not that great, her Spanish songs are fantastic. She's popular because she is sexy and has actual talent, a feat unknown in this particular country. As for Kylie Minogue, she's just a whore.
ReplyDeleteI really don't like the other anonymous.
ReplyDeleteWhile I suport everyone's right to be annonymous, perhaps you could all create some independant annonymous identities. Just so I can tell y'all appart...
ReplyDeleteAnd where is the fun for us if you can tell us apart?
ReplyDeleteI think the original anonymous is Kylie Minogue.
ReplyDeleteYou know, actually Shakira has blown me, and look at her now...
ReplyDelete