Wait, What Was I Saying?

I sat, stuffing my mouth with dressing-slathered salad and steaming spoonfuls of soup. It was noon on Sunday, and the Gin-and-Tonic family was brunching at the local soup and salad bar buffet. Admittedly, a step down from breakfast at the Benson, Stuffy's (as we call it) is an ideal dining diversion for a cranky baby.

Returning to the table from my second go at the Jello and fruit bar, I glanced around at this swelling congregation of post-church east-siders. They milled about like cattle, blank-faced, fresh from the pews. They wore ill-fitting, poorly pressed business attire, because that apparently pleaseth the Lord.

I was dressed, shall we say, less formally. Proudly broadcasting the fact that I was most definitely not coming from church. It could only have been more clear if I were smoking a cigarette and mixing vodka in with my orange juice.

I felt bad for these poor people who chose to wake up early on Sunday, and put on uncomfortable clothes to go give money and sing songs in a big sterile building because they chose to believe that an invisible man in the clouds wanted them to. It really made me sad.

But then, in an instant, it dawned on me. There are the peasants. These are the followers. These are the people who will believe anything you tell them. These are the workers who will cook my food and put gas in my car. These are the people who kept Bush in The White House.

It's OK to manipulate these folks, it the reason they exist. All you have to do is put on a good show. Tell them you like to watch Nascar and that you go to church every Sunday. Waive the flag and use the word patriotism now and then.. They are sure to put you into office.

And that, I think, is what Carl touched on in his Machiavelli blog a few weeks back. Carl's point, I think, was that The Prince is not about the ends justifying the means (as most cliff-notes-reading folks will tell you.) No, The Prince is about a way of life.

The path to power is not a series of decisions. No, it is a way of being, living free from the strictures of arbitrary morality. It is about manipulating the stupid and the wise alike. Be all things to all people as circumstances and needs dictate. Forget Sun Tzu. Don't bother with Tony Robbins. Pick up The Prince, and be the man.

Reading for comprehension

1. Jesus Christ, what a complete load of drivel. This one got completely away from me. Can you figure out where?
2. Can you even figure out what this entry was originally going to be about?
3. Would you be surprised to learn that this was originally going to be about the second season of Deadwood? I need to remind myself, no blogging when you haven't slept enough...