Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Go To

I was never in a fraternity, but I've known folks who were.

You can spot them, often, from across the room.

You can spot them without even looking at them.

They are the ones fetching the quick and easy laughs by their rapid recitation of popular movie one-liners. Quick quips from Animal House, Caddy Shack, and really almost anything Bill Murray has ever done.

These are the fraternal go-to zingers, always sure to bring a smile or a nod of approval.

I have my own, but really, nothing that was ever spoken in a movie. My go-to politicians, for instance, depending on the inappropriateness of the conversation, are Bob Dole and Bill Clinton. They are each funny in their own way.

The go-to obscure foreign land is Kuala Lampur.

Go-to hatefulness rotates between soggy bread, three-bean salad and professional basketball.

You get the picture. I keep this parcel of quick picks in my pocket, and pull them out to punctuate a conversation as needed. You, I'm sure, have your own.

Sadly, I have discovered, my go-to career advice for most women, and some men, is "stripper." I mean, it's mostly a joke. It's inflammatory and dirty, but if you have a hot bod and need cash, it seems like a no-brainer.

And I say it a lot. Enough to wonder whether maybe I really mean it. Hopeful wishing? maybe.

Lack of creative alternatives? More likely.

No one has taken me up on the advice, though. Oh well, I'll keep trying.

15 comments:

  1. other6:22 AM

    If you tell the loyal Lounge when and where, we'll fill the rail for your debut performance.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lucky Red7:09 AM

    I second that- I will get out my crisp ones for that spectacle- you're all talk and no action - let's see you take some of your own advice...I ask the readers what music should he dance to?
    Night Ranger? Def Leppard? Johnny Cash?

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  3. I think the ladies of the lounge should all put together a striptease video...I mean the calendar is great but...

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  4. I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?

    So because I like Bill Murray I must have been in a frat. I think what you are trying to say is that when you have nothing to write about you always fall back on mentioning strippers.

    And what the fuck is the big descision about?

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  5. I think the big decision is to give up being a lawyer and open his own Strip Club. Thats why he's touting for free strippers amongst his friends...

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  6. I don't know whether I can milk Dr. B or not, but I'd sure like to try

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  7. other3:21 PM

    Anything by a hair band would work.

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  8. Can't go wrong with any of Red's suggestions. Sounds like perhaps LR's favorite 3 song playlist?

    Maybe we WILL see a Ladies of the Lounge Video in the making...

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  9. I wouldn't count on a video boys. Calendar was one thing, dancing for you guys a total other.

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  10. Anonymous8:20 PM

    I'll bet Mr G&T would get up and strip to The Smiths.

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  11. White boy says he can't dance

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  12. destiny7:07 AM

    I like to dance to anything by Rob Zombie or Disturbed.

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  13. Rob Zombie - 'Living Dead Girl'

    followed by

    Lords of Acid - 'Show Me Your Pussy'

    Best stripper two song pairing EVER.

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  14. Hmmmm.....I guess I won't mention I go to an Exotic dance class!

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  15. Diva! You're holding out on us!

    ReplyDelete

Be compelling.

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